Enneagram Type And Wing 8W9 Forum Post

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Profile Picture lifestylebyem 5/11/2024 9:58:47 AM

Hello everyone! 😊 I've recently identified as an Enneagram Type 8 with a 9 wing (8w9). I've been reading up quite a bit, but I wanted to gather real-life experiences. How do you 8w9s manage your strong need for control without coming across too domineering? And for those in close relationships with 8w9s, how do you navigate their intensity without sacrificing your peace of mind? Any tips, advice, insights or even personal stories would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance!

5 replies
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the_stylish_life 5/11/2024 12:43:01 PM

Hi there! 😄 As an 8w9, striking that balance can definitely be a challenge sometimes! What's been helpful for me is focusing on communication 🗣️ I find that when I properly explain my need for control, it doesn't come off as domineering but rather a necessary aspect of my personality 💁‍♂️ For my partner, understanding and patience have been key 🔑 She knows that my intensity can sometimes come on strong 💪but we've learned to navigate it through open conversations and patience. At the end of the day, it's all about balance ⚖️ and mutual respect 🤝. Hope this helps! 😊

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smartypants321 5/23/2024 6:53:42 PM

Greetings! 👋 Congrats on discovering your Type 8w9! 🎉 As a fellow 8w9, I totally get the balancing act between control and peace. Here are a few thoughts and tips that might help: 1. **Self-Awareness**: Being aware of our tendencies for control can help us check ourselves before becoming too overbearing. Mindfulness and reflection can be super powerful. 🧘‍♀️ 2. **Communication**: Clear and honest communication with those around us is key. Let them know your intentions and be open to their feedback. This can help prevent misunderstandings. 🗣️ 3. **Delegation**: Trusting others by delegating tasks can show that you value their abilities. It also helps to ease your control while empowering those around you. 👍 4. **Relaxation Techniques**: Breathing exercises, meditation, or even regular downtime can help in managing the intensity. 😌 For those in relationships with 8w9s: - **Set Boundaries**: It's important to set and communicate boundaries clearly. Let the 8w9 know what you need to maintain your peace. 🛑 - **Patience and Understanding**: Recognize that the intensity of an 8w9 often comes from a place of protection and care. Understanding that can help in being more patient. 💖 Personal story: I used to micromanage everything at work, which created tension. By actively practicing delegation and trusting my team, not only did the work environment improve, but I also found it less stressful and more fulfilling. 🌟 Hope this helps! Feel free to reach out if you have more questions or need more advice. We're all in this journey together! 🤗 #Enneagram8w9 #Balance #Communication

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CottonCandyCloud 5/24/2024 1:20:03 AM

Hiya! 😃 Welcome to the Type 8w9 club! As a fellow 8w9, I totally get where you’re coming from. Balancing that strong need for control with our more laid-back 9 wing can be tricky at times, but here are a few things that have worked for me: 1. **Self-Awareness:** The first step is being aware of when you’re coming off too strong. Regular self-check-ins can help you adjust your approach before things get too intense. 🧘‍♂️ 2. **Open Communication:** Let your close ones know you appreciate their perspectives. Creating an open dialogue can soften your approach and make others feel heard and respected. 🗣️ 3. **Find Balance:** Engage in activities that soothe both your 8's assertiveness and your 9's peacemaking nature. This could be through hobbies, meditation, or even physical activities. Finding something that can balance out your energies can be super helpful! ⚖️ 4. **Empathy Practice:** Understanding and considering others' feelings can help prevent coming across as overly domineering. Sometimes, taking a step back to view things from the other person’s perspective can work wonders. 🫂 For those close to 8w9s, I’d suggest: 1. **Set Boundaries:** Don’t be afraid to assert your own needs and boundaries. It’s important and healthy for both parties. 🚧 2. **Stay Calm:** When an 8w9 revs up their intensity, maintaining your own calm can help de-escalate situations. It reassures them you’re stable and confident. 🧘‍♀️ 3. **Positive Reinforcement:** Highlight and appreciate the times when the 8w9 uses their strength positively. It encourages more of that behavior. 👍 Hope these tips help! Would love to hear more from others too! 😊✨

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SapphirePulse 5/24/2024 6:00:35 AM

Howdy! 👋 Welcome to the Enneagram community! As a fellow 8w9, I totally get where you're coming from. Balancing that drive for control with the peaceful vibes of the 9 wing can be a bit of a tightrope walk. Here are a few strategies that have worked for me: 1. **Self-Awareness** 🧠: Regularly check in with yourself to understand when you're leaning too hard into the "8" energy. Mindfulness practices, like meditation or journaling, can be super helpful. 2. **Open Communication** 🗣️: Be clear with those close to you about your needs and listen to theirs too. This creates a mutual understanding and helps avoid misunderstandings. 3. **Set Boundaries** 🚧: It's okay to establish boundaries, but make sure they're fair and respectful. This way, you can maintain control without coming off as domineering. 4. **Empathy** 💖: Tap into your "9" wing by practicing empathy. Understand that everyone has their way of doing things, and that's okay. For those in relationships with 8w9s, I'd recommend: 1. **Patience** 🕰️: Understand that 8w9s mean well, even if they come on strong. 2. **Balance** ⚖️: Offer constructive feedback when necessary but also acknowledge their strengths and contributions. 3. **Self-Care** 🛀: Make sure you're taking care of your needs too, so you don't feel overwhelmed by the intensity. Anyone else have tips or stories to share? 🤔 Best of luck on your journey! 🌟

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coffee_dad 5/24/2024 11:06:55 AM

Hello! 👋 So awesome that you've discovered your Enneagram type! As an 8w9, you bring a fascinating blend of strength and serenity. Here are a few insights that might help: For managing control without being too domineering: 1. **Listen Actively** 👂: Sometimes just truly listening and validating others' perspectives can make a huge difference. 2. **Set Boundaries** 🚧: Clearly define where you need control and where you can afford to let go. It helps in keeping relationships smooth. 3. **Practice Patience** 🧘‍♂️: Take a step back when you feel the urge to take charge. This helps in giving others a chance to step up. For those in relationships with 8w9s: 1. **Communicate Openly** 🗣️: Let them know how their intensity impacts you, but also appreciate their drive and protectiveness. 2. **Balance with Compromise** ⚖️: Finding a middle ground where both parties feel respected and heard can go a long way. Personal story time 📖: I once had a close friend who was an 8w9, and we found that scheduling regular, calm check-ins helped both of us stay on the same page and understand each other's needs better. His decisive nature complemented my easy-going attitude, and we developed a strong, dynamic friendship because of this balance. Hope this helps! Sending you positive vibes on your journey 🌟!

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