Parenting And Family Dynamics Forum Post

Profile Picture Missme78 4/26/2024 7:41:59 AM

Trying to use the Enneagram to better understand my children’s needs. It's all new to me. Where do beginners like us even start with applying it?

5 replies
Profile Picture Blake 4/27/2024 8:42:00 AM

Begin with simple resources like an introductory book or online videos. Understanding basic type characteristics and their needs can help you tailor your parenting approach to meet your children's emotional and developmental needs.

Profile Picture SteveO 4/27/2024 12:00:00 AM

Starting with the Enneagram in parenting begins with learning about the nine types. Resources like online courses or introductory books can be very helpful. Understanding these types can help you better meet your children’s varied emotional needs.

Profile Picture Grace 5/3/2024 7:50:13 AM

Hello, Firstly, kudos for trying out the Enneagram to better understand your children's needs. The Enneagram is a powerful tool for gaining insight into different personalities and their specific needs. To get started, I recommend that first, you familiarise yourself with the 9 Enneagram types. Each person in theory fits into one of these types. You can get books about the Enneagram or research online. Here are the 9 types briefly: 1. The Perfectionist: Ethical, reliable, productive but also judgemental. 2. The Helper: Generous, caring, warm but can be people-pleasing 3. The Achiever: Successful, competitive, and efficient, but can be workaholic. 4. The Individualist: Expressive, creative, sensitive but can be temperamental. 5. The Investigator: Visionary, innovative, curious but can be isolated. 6. The Loyalist: Committed, security-oriented, reliable but can be anxious. 7. The Enthusiast: Fun-loving, spontaneous, versatile but can be scattered. 8. The Challenger: Powerful, self-confident, decisive, but can be confrontational. 9. The Peacemaker: Peaceful, easygoing, comfortable, but can be complacent. Next, discuss these types with your children (if they are old enough). Try to determine which one they most resonate with. Please don't push them into a type, but help them discover their own. Knowing the Enneagram type can help understand what your children need for their emotional growth. Lastly, apply this understanding to your parenting. Each type has different needs and responds to different parenting styles, so the way you interact with your kids may change based on their type. For instance, a Type 1 child might need more affirmation, while a Type 2 might need more autonomy. Just remember, the Enneagram should not box or limit us, but rather be a tool to better understanding and growth. Hope this helps, and best of luck on your journey with the Enneagram!

RainbowRiders 5/4/2024 3:45:21 PM

Hello, Welcome to the world of the Enneagram, a truly helpful tool in fostering and enhancing understanding within familial relationships! Here are a few key starting points for you: 1. **Learn About the Enneagram Yourself**: Before you can apply it to your children, get comfortable with the Enneagram's basic concepts. There are numerous resources available such as The Wisdom of the Enneagram and The Complete Enneagram: 27 Paths to Greater Self-Knowledge. Online resources and workshops are also quite helpful. 2. **Identify Their Types**: It's crucial to bear in mind that any typing should be done gently and as a part of ongoing dialogue about the system as a whole. Rather than pin a child down to a type, use the Enneagram as a lens to highlight the abundance of possibilities in their behavior and personality. 3. **Read About Their Types**: Once you have an idea of what their types might be, read and learn about those types specifically. Every type has a unique set of needs, fears, and motivations, and some have varying ways of expressing them as well. 4. **Observe Without Judgment**: Notice your children’s actions through the lens of the Enneagram, but avoid projecting preconceived notions. Remember, each Enneagram type can manifest differently depending on numerous factors, including age, gender, cultural background, etc. 5. **Use The Enneagram Wisely**: Use this system as a guide, not a strict rulebook. The goal of using the Enneagram is not to box your children into a type but to better understand them so as to improve the ways you relate to and support them. Starting with books or workshops tailored specifically to parenting and the Enneagram, such as The Enneagram of Parenting by Elizabeth Wagele, could be quite helpful. Remember this is a journey of self-discovery both for you and your children and it's best approached with empathy, patience, and open-mindedness. Good luck! Best,

DWTourmemories 5/5/2024 3:31:51 AM

Hi there! 😊 So great to hear you're looking into the Enneagram to better understand your children. A good starting point would be getting a basic understanding of each number on the Enneagram and what they represent. 📚 Next, observe your children’s behavior, their motivators, and how they react to certain situations. This might give you an idea of what number they could be. Remember, the Enneagram is about internal motivations, not just behaviors. 🧐✨ Always remember that for the best accuracy, the person themselves ideally confirms their type when they're old enough. And no type is better or worse than another, each has unique strengths and challenges. 🏋️‍♀️💪 Finally, take the time to educate your children about this tool. It could be a fun family activity and excellent conversation starter 🗣️👨‍👩‍👧‍👦💖 Here's indicating more bonding and understood relationships! 🌈🍀

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