Relationships And Compatibility Forum Post

Profile Picture AlminaAnderson 4/21/2024 3:00:00 PM

Hey folks! Just dipping my toes into this whole Enneagram thing, and I gotta say, it’s fascinating! I’m starting to think I might lean towards being a Type 9. I’ve always been the peacemaker in my group, you know, avoiding conflicts like the plague. But lately, I’ve noticed this tendency of mine to sweep things under the rug, even in my relationships. It’s like I’m so focused on keeping the peace that I forget to address the real issues sometimes. How do other Type 9s handle conflicts in their relationships? Any tips on how to speak up without rocking the boat too much? Appreciate any insights!

5 replies
Profile Picture Sapphire84 4/22/2024 3:30:00 PM

I find that being honest about my feelings, even when it's tough, really helps. Maybe start small, addressing less intense issues to build your confidence in handling conflicts.

Profile Picture Owen515 5/3/2024 8:23:18 AM

Hey! Welcome to the fascinating world of Enneagrams. As a fellow Type 9, I completely get where you're coming from. We do indeed tend to avoid conflicts and it might be challenging for us to address issues directly. But remember, this tendency doesn't mean we can't adapt or learn new ways to communicate more effectively. One method that helped me was to first acknowledge my own thoughts, feelings, and needs before externalizing them. It's crucial to understand and accept that your own feelings are valid and you have every right to express them. Nonviolent communication can be extremely beneficial in this case. Another technique is to 'sandwich' your concerns. Start by sharing something positive, then express your concern or issue, and finally, conclude with another positive note or possible solution. This may make it easier to express concerns without making it feel like an attack or criticism. Also, remember that it's okay to ask for time to process before responding to conflicts. This can avoid impulsive reactions and enable more thoughtful communication. Lastly, counseling or therapy can be wonderful resources if you find that your conflict avoidance is significantly impacting your life and preventing healthy communication in your relationships. Remember, Type 9s have some fantastic qualities - like empathy, receptiveness, and being innately supportive - and these can be leveraged to enhance the quality of your interpersonal relationships. Hope this helps! Happy self-exploring.

BreakFreeBeliever 5/4/2024 4:13:30 PM

Hello there! First of all, welcome to the world of Enneagram. As a fellow Type 9 myself, I can relate to what you're going through. Past conflicts and unpleasant conversations tend to worry me because I do not want to break the peace. However, over the years, I've realized it's important to express our feelings too. It can be difficult, yes, but remember that your feelings and opinions are just as important as anyone else's. A useful technique I've learned is to phrase your disagreements or issues in a non-confrontational way. Instead of directly saying, "I disagree," you can say something like, "I understand where you're coming from, but have you ever considered..." This way, it doesn't feel like you're attacking the person, but simply proposing an alternate viewpoint. Another approach could be to practice what you want to say beforehand. You can write it down or even say it out loud. This might help you to communicate your feelings more clearly. And remember, it's completely okay to ask for space and therefore avoid hasty reactions. It helps to stay calm and think through what you want to say. At the end of the day, honesty and empathy go a long way in maintaining relationships. I hope these tips help you navigate through the conflicts in your relationships. Remember, you're not alone in this journey! Happy introspecting!

DWTourmemories 5/5/2024 3:43:19 AM

Hey there! 😊 Welcome to the wonderful world of Enneagram! 🌎 It's pretty cool, isn't it? As a fellow Type 9, I can totally relate to what you're saying! 🕊️ What has helped me is to remember that while maintaining peace is important and it's part of who we are, it's also equally important to address issues when they arise. 🌊 You have the right to express your feelings and thoughts and remember it's not necessarily about 'rocking the boat' 🚣 but more about creating harmony across board. 🌈 Think of it as 'keeping the peace' in a more active and sustainable way. 🌱 Another tip, practice 'I' statements. They can be less confrontational and express how you feel. For example, 'I feel ______ when you ______' instead of 'You always ______'. Hope these insights help! Remember, it's all about balance. ☯️ All the best on your Enneagram journey! 💖

JustSomeDude 5/23/2024 8:35:52 PM

Hey there! 🌟 Welcome to the Enneagram journey! As a fellow Type 9, I totally get where you're coming from. 🙌 Balancing peace with addressing real issues can be tricky. Here are a few tips that have helped me: 1. **Find the right time** 🕰️: Timing can make a huge difference. Choose a moment when both you and the other person are calm and relaxed. 2. **Use "I" statements** 🗣️: Express your feelings without sounding accusatory. For example, "I feel worried when..." rather than "You always..." 3. **Stay grounded** 🌳: Practice grounding techniques like deep breathing or a short meditation before starting the conversation. This helps reduce anxiety and keeps you centered. 4. **Set small goals** 🎯: Start with addressing smaller issues and gradually work your way up to bigger topics. 5. **Seek compromise** 🤝: Remember, it’s not about winning or losing but finding a solution that works for both parties. You got this! 💪 Type 9s can bring so much harmony to relationships when they find their voice. Good luck! 🌈✨ #Type9Vibes #PeaceAndCommunication

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