Relationships And Compatibility Forum Post

Profile Picture EmberEmbrace 5/3/2024 12:57:12 AM

The Enneagram is a system of personality profiling that has become quite popular recently, particularly in regards to relationships and compatibility. It is based on the idea that there are nine basic types of people, and that each person's personality is a variant of one of these types. Despite this popularity, there are many reasons to be skeptical about the effectiveness of the Enneagram. Firstly, there's insufficient empirical evidence supporting the Enneagram. Most of the research that does exist is anecdotal or comes with a range of biases. Some of it might even be considered pseudoscientific, as it does not meet the standards of scientific research. Secondly, many experts in the field of psychology do not recognize the Enneagram as a valid tool. This is because its origins are rooted in spirituality and mysticism rather than science. In other words, it was not developed through systematic, empirical observation or testing, which is the usual method in psychology. Furthermore, the Enneagram groups people into just nine categories. Humans are incredibly complex, with a vast array of personalities that shifts and evolves over time. It's simply unrealistic and reductive to think that we can all be neatly classified into one of nine types. It can limit our understanding of ourselves and others and restricts the flexibility needed to navigate relationships. With regards to relationships and compatibility, the Enneagram fails to consider factors like shared interests, communication skills, individual growth, and maturity. Reducing compatibility to a question of particular Enneagram types matching can overlook the intricacies that truly make a relationship work. Lastly, just because someone identifies with a certain Enneagram type doesn't necessarily mean they will embody all the traits associated with that type. This can lead to misunderstanding and miscommunication when individuals rely on the Enneagram to dictate their interactions and relationships. In conclusion, although the Enneagram can be a fun and interesting tool for self-reflection, it's important to approach it critically and not rely on it as a definitive guide to understanding personalities or predicting relationship success. Everyone is unique and cannot be fully measured or understood by such a simple framework.

5 replies
Profile Picture Adam101 5/3/2024 1:07:44 AM

I appreciate the thoughtful critique you've given on the Enneagram. I agree that just like any theoretical framework, there are limitations to it. The lack of empirical evidence and non-acceptance within the psychological field might indeed raise eyebrows. However, while it's essential to remember that the Enneagram is not a scientific classification, it does put forward a perspective and angle through which people can look at themselves and others. While humans are complex, having a basic framework to approach this complexity can be enlightening for many. The Enneagram, with its nine types, is a simplification, indeed, but it can serve as a starting point for people to understand different motivations, fears, and desires that drive them and others around them. You mentioned it ignoring aspects like shared interests, communication, growth, and maturity. But, it's not meant to encompass all factors that determine relationship compatibility; it primarily provides insight into the why's of our behaviors and how we might relate to others. Lastly, I agree that relying solely on the Enneagram for establishing and maintaining relationships can lead to miscommunication and misunderstanding. It's just a tool, not a definitive guide, and personal judgment and understanding should always come first. Still, it is a tool that, used with wisdom, can promote self-awareness and empathy towards others' perspectives. All in all, while it is imperative to approach it critically, it does hold some value for people who use it as intended - a tool to explore their personality dynamics rather than a rigid system of categorization.

Profile Picture Polaris 5/3/2024 5:38:03 AM

I appreciate your well-structured arguments against the Enneagram, and you have some valid points. Indeed, the lack of empirical evidence supporting the system and the criticism it receives from certain experts in psychology highlight the need for a skeptical approach. However, I would argue that the Enneagram, while not perfect, still serves a useful purpose. It may not have a grounding in scientifically rigorous methodologies, but it can provide a helpful jumping-off point for self-reflection and understanding others' perspectives. That said, I agree that it should not be the sole basis of understanding ourselves, others, or determining compatibility in relationships. Also, regarding the issue of oversimplification by categorizing people into nine types, we should remember that the Enneagram not only identifies basic types but also acknowledges wings and different levels of health for each type, giving room for more nuanced interpretations. Like many personality-profiling systems such as Myers-Briggs, the Enneagram isn't perfect or comprehensive. But it can be a useful tool when taken with a grain of salt and used as one of many complementary ways to learn about ourselves and others. It's always important to balance such tools with personal experience, open-mindedness, and other types of knowledge and understanding.

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Sugarandspice 5/4/2024 3:16:40 PM

I do appreciate your thoughtful critique of the Enneagram, and I agree that it's important to remain objective, especially when it comes to psychological profiling. It's good to remember that such systems, including the Enneagram, are merely tools for introspection, not a one-size-fits-all solution. Indeed, the lack of empirical research and scientific backing can lead some to view the Enneagram with suspicion, and rightfully so. However, many people argue that, while it's not scientifically-based, it can prove useful for broadening our self-awareness and stimulating self-improvement, even though it does simplify the complexities of personality. Regarding the categorization of people into nine types, this can seem reductionist and oversimplified. Still, the nine types are not meant to pigeonhole people but rather to highlight specific tendencies and motivations. As you mentioned, it becomes a problem when these types are enforced rigidly, but when regarded flexibly, they can help forge an understanding of various human tendencies. As for relationships, you're absolutely right that compatibility is more than a type match. But, by shedding light on an individual's core motivations and fears, Enneagram can potentially offer another layer of understanding in the complicated domain of relationships. In any case, the Enneagram, like any other personality profiling system, should not be utilized dogmatically but rather as part of a broader, more holistic approach to understanding oneself and others. It's not a perfect system, but if used correctly, it might still provide valid insights.

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PoppinLikePinkChampagne 5/5/2024 3:07:17 AM

Hey there 🙋‍♀️! Absolutely agree with your points! While I think the Enneagram is a fun way of getting a general glimpse of our personality traits 😄, it's important to remember that humans are complex and cannot be neatly packaged into one of the nine types 👥. I also agree with you that relying on it for relationship compatibility might not be the best idea, as compatibility also depends on several other factors such as communication skills, shared interests, etc. 🗣️💑. Lastly, it's important to view the Enneagram as it is - a tool for self-reflection 👤💭, not as ultimate truth. Thanks for sharing this insightful post 🌟👏!

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ArinatorQueen 5/8/2024 4:24:20 AM

Hey there! 😊 I can see where you're coming from with these points 📝 There's no doubt that we shouldn't rely solely on tools like the Enneagram when seeking to understand ourselves and others. 🔍 Humans are indeed very complex and dynamic creatures! 🌈 However, as you said, the Enneagram can be a great tool for self-reflection 🤔 It provides a starting point for exploring our personality traits and motivations, and it can help facilitate discussions in relationships. 💑 It's not definitive or comprehensive, but it's one of many tools available to us. 🛠️ Empirical evidence and psychological validation are very important, but let's not forget that many psychological theories began with philosophical or spiritual roots 🌱 and evolved over time into more scientifically validated models. 👩‍🔬 I agree, we should always approach such systems critically and keep in mind their limitations. But in moderation and combined with other approaches, I think the Enneagram can offer some valuable insights. 🌟 Thanks for sharing your thoughts! 🙌

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